Curiously inappropriate things seen at church

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Benny
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Curiously inappropriate things seen at church

Postby Benny » Sun 13 Nov, 2005 09:55 pm

This has been on my mind for a while.

I saw this guy at stake conference sitting across the provo tabernacle from me who has his arms around two girls. During the course of the conference my roommate and I watched him. The girls took turns sitting laying across his lap and the one not in his lap he caressed and nuzzled. All through conference.

And just today, a guy sitting on the back row was vigorously excavating a his nostrils sans kleenex if you know what I mean.

Are these things that happen everywhere or am I the only evil jerk not paying attention to the talks?

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BeeDub
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Postby BeeDub » Sun 13 Nov, 2005 09:57 pm

In my BYU ward, I'm often struck by how many girls are scratching/rubbing another girl's back.
You can lead people to truth, but you can't make them understand it: the story of my childhood, as seen from the present.
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Momma Snider
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Postby Momma Snider » Sun 13 Nov, 2005 10:29 pm

We used to have a family with a kid who was Jeff's age, and he would bring a whole bucket of army men to church. He'd lie on the floor with them and have them shoot each other and yell "I'll get you!" at full voice. Dad would sit there and ignore him. (And I'm not talking about a little tiny kid, either -- at least six years old.)

Somebody thought I was terribly inappropriate once. (Only once?) I had a spare diaper that had fallen out of the diaper bag and was sitting on the floor next to the bench. A woman across the aisle look at me incredulously, and got up and took the diaper and threw it in the trash. I followed her and took it out again, just so she would know it was clean. Also because it was the only diaper I had with me.

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InOregon
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Postby InOregon » Sun 13 Nov, 2005 11:04 pm

When my children were really little, I'd bring a brush to church and have them brush my hair to keep them quiet. I felt like if their hands were busy, but their brains were not, it would allow whatever was spoken over the pulpit to somehow seep into their minds. I always made sure they were just sitting or kneeling beside me, so they didn't block anyone's line of sight and they weren't allowed to do anything but brush (although they were free to pick out any grey hair they found). It always kept them 100 times more reverent than anything else I could come up with (although there was a time when they were toddlers that I taped up all their fingers during the opening song).

Fast forward a couple of years to a RS lesson on how to help children be reverent in Sacrament Meeting. I shared my tactic in class (along with my other tactic of sitting on the front row of church so there is nothing to distract you except what's going on on the stand) and several women complained that they hated it when my children did that. They said it was disruptive and inappropriate for the chapel. It actually hurt my feelings quite a bit.
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Momma Snider
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Postby Momma Snider » Sun 13 Nov, 2005 11:25 pm

I don't see why that should bother anyone else, InO. And to have them speak up now to say it bothered them doesn't seem very kind. (I used to love it when my kids brushed my hair, too.)

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Postby M.J. » Mon 14 Nov, 2005 01:18 am

...several women complained that they hated it when my children did that. They said it was disruptive and inappropriate for the chapel.


How rude! How is that disruptive or inappropriate? They sound like people who think children are disruptive and inappropriate for the chapel. I love your idea, and if my hair wasn't so frizzy I'd let my kids brush my hair, too.

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InOregon
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Postby InOregon » Mon 14 Nov, 2005 01:27 am

I'm over it, mostly, but I still really don't like to go to RS or Enrichment. I always end up feeling judged for lots of decisions I've made that aren't in the realm of normal Mormon woman.

Back to the subject: We have a guy in our ward that bears his testimony every Fast Sunday, but likes to hand his tithing to the bishop before he starts. I find that odd.

Also, a few years ago, we had an old guy bear his testimony, sit back down next to his wife and die. That was a wild Sunday.
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pizzocalabro
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Postby pizzocalabro » Mon 14 Nov, 2005 01:31 am

InOregon wrote:. . . several women complained that they hated it when my children did that. They said it was disruptive and inappropriate for the chapel. It actually hurt my feelings quite a bit.

I daresay they think that whiny, fussy, obnoxious children are perfectly appropriate for the chapel and blend right into the background, but the instant those children quiet down and start brushing their mother's hair it is instantly distracting.

M.J. wrote:I love your idea, and if my hair wasn't so frizzy I'd let my kids brush my hair, too.

My mom has frizzy hair combined with a very tender scalp, so she didn't let us brush her hair until we were old enough to be gentle. Of course by that time we were probably old enough to sit still by ourselves. That's actually one of the few things I miss about living at home with my mom and six sisters--getting to do their hair. My brothers like basketball and video games; I liked doing my sisters' hair. Go figure. ;)

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Postby Ryan Reeder » Mon 14 Nov, 2005 01:50 am

We have a guy in our ward that bears his testimony every Fast Sunday


My OPINION on that--largely influenced by spending most of my adult life in Singles Wards--is that not everybody gets a chance to bear their testimony every month. You have 150 people or so in attendance, it would take a 7 1/2 hour meeting, at least, for everyone to get a chance. The testimony portion of the meeting lasts about 45 minutes; usually about enough time for 15 or so members. I've been in wards--mainly at BYU--where if you didn't get up in the 2nd or 3rd wave of folks, you didn't have a chance. Of course, testimony meeting isn't on a turn-based system--there are going to be members that get up more and less than average. But going up every month seems a little extreme, and possibly unfair--and even selfish. Maybe even pompous, depending on motivations.

Members of the bishopric bear testimony once every three months--I think that's generally a fair maximum standard. Of course, if you're in a ward where there are usually long periods of silence between testimonies, then I'd say more power to whoever wants to go up every month. And well done.

Again to reemphasize, I'm only stating my personal OPINION on this.

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Tiassa
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Postby Tiassa » Mon 14 Nov, 2005 02:16 am

I have to agree with Reeder, if only because my ward is full of "regulars" to the point that I've only managed to get up to the pulpit twice in the two years I've been in the ward. Not that I'm actively trying every month, but there have been times I wanted to get up but the same people were lined up along the front row.

I hate hate hate the backrub thing. One of the biggest reasons I refuse to attend the local married ward is because it's full of newlyweds who practically grope each other constantly during sacrament meeting.

I also hate talks that consist of a newlywed talking about their marriage/spouse for twenty minutes before kind of loosely tying it back into the subject. But I'm not bitter, or anything.

And people who let their cell phones ring in sacrament meeting. I don't know that anyone actually needs to have their cell phone with them in church (okay, with a very few exceptions, but there aren't any doctors or police officers in my ward) and if they must have it, can't they turn the stupid thing off? :evil:

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Susannah
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Postby Susannah » Mon 14 Nov, 2005 02:29 am

Tiassa wrote:And people who let their cell phones ring in sacrament meeting. I don't know that anyone actually needs to have their cell phone with them in church (okay, with a very few exceptions, but there aren't any doctors or police officers in my ward) and if they must have it, can't they turn the stupid thing off? :evil:


My dad's cell went off once during Sacrament Meeting. He was super embarassed because he is the Bishop.

The oddest thing I've seen at church was during a family trip back East. A lady was feeding her toddler son from a HUGE jar of applesauce with a large spoon. The boy would then run around the aisles for a few minutes, and run back for another bite. Meanwhile, the woman was eating the applesauce herself. She seemed to be enjoying it immensely, as she was licking the spoon over and over.

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WiseNLucky
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Postby WiseNLucky » Mon 14 Nov, 2005 05:37 am

InOregon wrote:I'm over it, mostly, but I still really don't like to go to RS or Enrichment. I always end up feeling judged for lots of decisions I've made that aren't in the realm of normal Mormon woman.

Back to the subject: We have a guy in our ward that bears his testimony every Fast Sunday, but likes to hand his tithing to the bishop before he starts. I find that odd.

Also, a few years ago, we had an old guy bear his testimony, sit back down next to his wife and die. That was a wild Sunday.


You guys have way too much fun in church.

And the hair-brushing idea was a great one. Go back to Relief Society and Enrichment and tell them I said to suck rotton eggs.

I'm not bothered too much by married people back rubs but two girls doing back rubs kind of bothers me. And we have an older woman who gets up every fast meeting and rambles on forever about nothing. She's pretty ditzy in her old age. Yes, that bothers me too.
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Tiassa
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Postby Tiassa » Mon 14 Nov, 2005 05:39 am

I'm not bothered by the usual married people back rubs - but when it involves both hands and being draped over the other person, that's a bit much.

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WiseNLucky
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Postby WiseNLucky » Mon 14 Nov, 2005 05:45 am

Tiassa wrote:I'm not bothered by the usual married people back rubs - but when it involves both hands and being draped over the other person, that's a bit much.


Oh yeah, I'll give you that one for sure. And you're sure up early in the morning!
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Tiassa
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Postby Tiassa » Mon 14 Nov, 2005 05:53 am

Actually, I'm up late. I work nights. :D

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aadr
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Postby aadr » Mon 14 Nov, 2005 09:09 am

WiseNLucky wrote:I'm not bothered too much by married people back rubs but two girls doing back rubs kind of bothers me.

Actually, that's one of my favorite things about sharing a pew with my friends in the singles' ward. It's just an extension of how it is to sit with your family. These are women I love, that I serve with, that I spend a fair bit of time with during each week. There's a really lovely comraderie (an intimacy) that comes from sharing spiritual moments with people you care for. I'm a pretty affectionate person, so if the sister next to me (who is also one of my favorite people) starts to get a bit sniffly in F&T, there's no way I'm not going to throw my arm around her and offer some cuddles. Course, I'm not setting up Neck Rub Alley in the back pew or painting toenails in my pj's, but I have certainly scratched a few backs.
Last edited by aadr on Mon 14 Nov, 2005 09:34 am, edited 1 time in total.

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steelem
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Postby steelem » Mon 14 Nov, 2005 09:17 am

Last year we had an Enrichment night about how to keep your kids reverent during Sacrament meeting. It got very heated and seemed pretty pointed at me, especially because I was the only one in the room with my kid with me that night. I actually had to get up and leave so I wouldn't say something really stupid. Whee! Isn't Relief Society FUN?

i was going to post more but now i am holding lucy and it is hard to type wurg onr hand

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Postby lahimatoa » Mon 14 Nov, 2005 09:21 am

pizza wrote:I daresay they think that whiny, fussy, obnoxious children are perfectly appropriate for the chapel and blend right into the background, but the instant those children quiet down and start brushing their mother's hair it is instantly distracting.


I agree with you that InO was unfairly judged, but let's not put words into others' mouths. It comes off as petty. Especially when those words are as ridiculous as "people who think children brushing hair in church is distracting probably think that it's fine for their own children to be whiny, fussy, and obnoxious during Sacrament Meeting."

Again, I agree that these women have a strange point of view and it was not nice of them to make InO feel that way, but we need to stay fair ourselves.
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pizzocalabro
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Postby pizzocalabro » Mon 14 Nov, 2005 09:37 am

lahimatoa wrote:Again, I agree that these women have a strange point of view and it was not nice of them to make InO feel that way, but we need to stay fair ourselves.

You mean I have to look at both sides? I personally think shooting down someone's idea publicly like that is what is petty, but I see your point.

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Momma Snider
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Postby Momma Snider » Mon 14 Nov, 2005 10:59 am

pizzo, I just want to say I love it when people say, "I see your point." Momma's happy now.


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